I have decided to start a new business. It’s sole purpose is to incite fear in the minds of physical therapists so that they will buy my services. It’s a proven business model. Here is my plan:
I will offer a coding and compliance course for PT’s throughout the U.S. which of course is necessary cause PT’s are too stupid to know how to read coding and compliance manuals. Since they are too stupid to read the manuals, I will convince them that they are crooks who don’t follow the rules.
I will then:
Repeat often and to everyone that all PT’s are crooks
Cite as evidence that “all PT’s are crooks” my experience in working with insurance companies and the government and discovering fraudulent documentation and coding 100% of the time. I will make the claim that the greatest rise in state penitentiaries is PT incarceration for not following the rules
Detail malicious fraudulent cases as evidence that all PT’s are crooks even though the acts were pre-meditated and included things like billing dead people. I will convince PT’s that they have to attend my workshop which I will further by appearance act as though my position is “endorsed” by PT national association and all states
Frequently remind and confuse PT’s that they are stupid by saying things like “this isn’t just a medicare rule, it is CPT code definition”
Further implore PT’s that if they have any support personnel working in the clinic that are in visual site of a patient that they are more crooked than all the other PT crooks
Have a website with a Q and A section that will further confuse with big words, clinical coding examples, and wild claims that can be interpreted different ways adding to confusion and paralysis
Further remind PT’s that their “doctoring” profession and “autonomy” vision, and state/model practice acts are nice statements but impractical and meaningless. The real manual for physical therapy is CPT codes, medicare rules, and compliance manuals whose sole purpose is to prevent any use of judgment and thought. If a PT has to think, it will be fraudulent thought so let’s not put them in that position.
Educate PT’s that whether they like it or not they are billeable minute employees on a salary cap determined by RBRVS (will also show the calculation of RBRVS as a differential equation that PT’s can never figure out)
Hand out a chart that they can post of 8 minutes added to 15, 30, 45, and 60 since PT’s are too stupid to calculate for themselves and remind them that 8 minutes applies to all payors
Boldly state to PT’s that even though a PTA degree is 2/7ths of a DPT, that in the eyes of the federal government they are synonymous
Warn the private practice PT’s (who clearly are the biggest crooks) that they have to sign contracts below their costs or they will violate the newest update to the PT Ethics 2.0 and risk losing their license.
Hold out as example the New York State Practice Act out as the “gold standard” since extenders are not allowed. If asked why the state that is the most regulated has the lowest reimbursement of about $55 per visit, I will remind them that it’s because “all PT’s are crooks” and that the amount is way more than the soup line workers at Leavenworth which is where they will end up if they allow extenders to consume oxygen in the same facility as a patient
Warn all PT’s to NEVER OPEN UP YOUR PRACTICE ACT which is a technique that has worked for over 30 years. If they ask “why”, don’t respond with any history or example but remind them that opening up a practice act will allow hairdressers, nail technicians, and orthopedists to steal away direct access and manipulation
Friendly mention that they have to attend my yearly seminar updates or else they will go down the road of perdition
Proudly declare that the only way you can make sure that you are not a crook is to take my coding and compliance course, hire me for consulting services, and threaten that unless you use my documentation software regardless of whether or not you have taken my course or used my consulting services that you still are a crook
Don’t bother to wish me luck in this new endeavor as the model is already working-I just want to monetize it-beats $55 a visit in NY
